Fading to Grey
by ChloChlo1989
Summary: His uniquely cerulean eyes faded in to a grey nothing, leaving behind a shallow shell of what once was a deep expanse of ocean and sky, both mysterious and beautiful in their own right. *Oneshot/Sample of Following the Darkness*


Hi guys! It's been ages since I have posted any stories, but I have one in the works at the moment, but the beginning of it just seemed to good to not post on its own to get your preliminary response. I have kept any dialogue and actions exactly the same as they are in the movies, apart from the turbolift scene towards the end. I do not own Star Trek. Enjoy and please review!

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His body jolted, along with his colleagues, as the ship stabilised and finally ascended, emerging above the surrounding clouds. His colleagues released drawn out breaths, which were identified by himself as what humans refer to as 'sighs of relief'. Smiles overtook all of their features, as they informed the Acting Captain of the ships now stabilised status.

"Mr Spock, altitude stabilising," informed Lieutenant Sulu.

"It's a miracle," said the Acting Navigator, in relief.

"There are no such things," Spock corrected, as the seat belt on the Captain's chair retreated, and he skimmed through all of his knowledge of the USS Enterprise to figure out how the ship had managed to regain power and stabilise.

When a message from engineering came through on the Captain's chair panel, Spock accepted it immediately, expecting a damage report.

"Engineering to bridge," Lieutenant Montgomery Scott's voice rang out. "Mr Spock?"

"Mr Scott."

"Sir, you'd better get down here," The Chief Engineer suggested. "Better hurry".

The underlying urgency in his tone caused the First Officer to jump out of the chair and sprint to the door, barely registering that he had ran into Nyota. As he entered the turbolift and pressed the deck for engineering, Spock could not help but wonder where the Captain was, a feeling of dread, which he would never admit to, settling in his abdomen.

As Spock reached the correct deck, he resumed sprinting to engineering, until he saw the grief on the Chief Engineer's face, which caused his sprint to decrease to a slow walk. The dread in his stomach grew exponentially.

Once he reached him, the engineer just shook his head, defeat overtaking his facial features.

Instinctively, Spock looked towards the warp core, and rushed towards it. Upon seeing his Captain crawling towards the door, his breathing faltered and he minutely shook his head in disbelief.

"Open it," Spock ordered the engineer, his own logic fading.

"The decontamination process is not complete, you'd flood the whole compartment," Responded the engineer, grief evident in his voice. "The door's locked, sir."

Looking back towards the door, Spock's breathing remained slightly laboured and irregular. Shaking his head minutely again, he lowered himself to a crouch to be closer to his Captain, who had reached the door. His laboured breathing and fatigue informed Spock of cell irradiation. In a futile attempt, Spock patted the door between them twice, willing it to disappear, so that he could touch him, comfort him or even save him. But upon the realisation that he could do none of these, Spock's control began to collapse. Logic no longer seemed important to him, for he wanted to open the door, regardless of the damage and further it would cause, just to be close to his Captain.

As Kirk reached up to close the decontamination door, Spock followed his movement, savouring the remaining energy in his Captain, simply staring at him as he regained his breath from the strain the minor gesture had caused.

As cerulean eyes met his brown ones, Spock's breathing faltered once again, his lacrimal glands began to secrete what human biology refers to as 'tears' in to his eyes.

"How's our ship?" Asked the Captain, breathily.

"Out of danger," Spock responded, his voice thick with emotion. "You saved the crew."

"You used what he wanted against him," admired the young Captain, much too young to be dying, as his breathing became heavier. "That was a nice move."

"It is what you would have done."

"And this, this is what you would have done," The truth in his statement was the final straw, as disbelief and shock overtook his own features, his control beginning to crumble rapidly. "It was only logical."

Spock's wet eyes flitted over his Captain's face and chest, as his mind calculated that his Captain was correct, cursing himself for the situations not being reversed. Cursing the logic that he had followed and supported his entire life as a Vulcan. His Captain- Jim, should not be here, should not be dying. It should have been himself.

As his eyes moved back up to meet blue ones, he saw the laboured attempt at a smile from Jim, his eyes red and his face beginning to pale.

"I'm scared, Spock, help me not to be," requested Kirk, causing the tears contained in Spock's eyes to begin cascading down his face, at the heartbreaking realisation that not only could he not save him, but he could not comfort him in his final moments.

"How do you choose not to feel?" Asked Kirk, his tone filled with disbelief, his eyes breaking away from Spock's, who was shaking his head.

"I do not know, right now I am failing," admitted Spock, the grief in his tone unmissable, as Kirk looked at him in shock, before he smiled as much as the energy remaining in his body allowed.

"I want you to know why I couldn't let you die," Jim spoke, determined. "Why I went back for you."

"Because you are my friend," Spock responded immediately, a tear falling from his face on to the floor beneath him, the beginnings of an irregular puddle of loss and despair.

Kirk's face fell at the words, his eyes moving away from Spock, as he struggled to speak.

Reaching out, Kirk used the last remnants of his energy to place his hand on the barrier between them, in an attempt to get as close to him as possible. Spock returned the gesture, without hesitation, but did so slowly, as he feared this moment's end. He feared the loss of his friend. The loss of Jim.

Placing his hand on the clear door, Spock's hand formed a Vulcan salute out of respect and admiration for his Captain's victory, and subsequent sacrifice. Had he known what the cadet, who hacked the Kobayashi Maru, would become, he would not have assumed him to be as arrogant and selfish as his facade appeared. Underneath his challenging behaviour, stood a confident, selfless captain, and a deeply caring individual, whom Spock was proud to call his friend.

In a moment, Kirk returned the gesture, fitting their left hands together more accurately, despite the glass barrier. Looking back at Jim, with tears cascading down his normally stoic face, he saw him smiling blissfully at their almost touching hands, his own tears beginning to form, before his face fell again and the smile disappeared. Kirk returned his eyes to Spock's face, as their hands remained in place, unmoving.

After a few short moments, Kirk's breathing began to falter, causing Spock to place his right hand on the door between them, in an attempt to once again remove the barrier in futile hope that it would simply no longer be present.

As Kirk's tears began to fall, his face formed a bittersweet smile, that Spock urged to reach out and touch, to bloom the smile of happiness he always saw when the Captain first walked on to the bridge. However, a moment later, the bittersweet smile disappeared from his face, as he expelled his final breath and his eyes left Spock's, becoming unfocused. His uniquely cerulean eyes faded in to a grey nothing, leaving behind a shallow shell of what once was a deep expanse of ocean and sky, both mysterious and beautiful in their own right.

Spock flexed the fingers in his left hand out of the Vulcan salute, in an attempt to press harder on his glass, as Kirk's hand fell from it's position, leaving Spock's to press against the glass alone- leaving Spock alone.

After a moment, Spock's hands fell from the glass door in defeat upon realisation that Jim was lost to this world, causing more tears began to form. Looking away, Spock's breathing became even more uncontrolled, as he struggled to process the loss of his Captain- of Jim.

He faintly heard the soft tears of the Chief Engineer, as Nyota ran up beside him, her own sobs forming shortly after.

As Spock attempted to calculate the cause of such trauma, he avoided making eye contact with his deceased Captain, the grief and subsequent crumbled remains of his shields scattered like shattered glass in every gap of his mindscape, simultaneously distorting it while causing a stabbing pain in every inch of it.

His breathing increased, as he realised who was at fault, who had killed his Captain, who had caused him to lose Jim forever.

 _Khan._

Anger overwhelmed him, the shattered glass of his shields becoming a multitude of daggers in his mind, directed at one individual.

"KHAN!" He screamed in rage, before jumping to his feet, once again sprinting past Nyota, barely registering her presence, as he attempted to reach the bridge.

"Spock," whispered Nyota, as she stared at him cautiously in the turbolift.

"This lift appears faulty," Responded Spock, urgency evident in his voice, with a deep undertone of grief, as he proceeded to illogically press the 'Bridge' button again and again. "It is moving much slower than is its usual."

"Spock, it is moving at its usual speed."

"It is not."

"Spock..."

"It is not moving efficiently."

"Spock, I-"

"IT IS NOT MOVING FAST ENOUGH!" Yelled Spock, his eyes still fixed intently on the turbolift doors, missing Lieutenant Uhura's flinch.

As the turbolift doors finally began to open, Spock speeded out of them before they fully opened, as he ordered the crew to find out if his target was still living. As much as the anger coursing through his body wished him to be deceased, he wanted him to be alive just so that he could be the one to avenge his Captain- Jim.

After several minutes, Spock had beamed down the quad of Starfleet Headquarters, his attention immediately focusing on his intended target, as he turned his head in a predatory motion.

With a vow to avenge his Captain, by putting an end to his murderer, Spock sprinted after Khan, unknowing of the Chief Medical Officer's success with reviving a Tribble using Khan's blood- a way to save his Captain. A way to save Jim.


End file.
